CLEANER(S)

i have a new spotify playlist, another one without direction. i'm now a house cleaner and work is nice even if it's tiring. i can listen to music and i made this playlist so i wouldn't have to whip out my phone every couple songs and look like i'm slacking. 

a lot has happened since my last update. i've been here for more than a month now. i got a laptop, savings, assessments done, endless plans to go home and visit, and of course the cleaning job.

i feel like i've been experiencing so much that i can never truly take every moment in. i yearn for a windy sunset and a second to pause. 

because i'm kind of miserable.

things are slowly sinking in (i burned my fingers).

i've started feeling guilty over being sad about where i am in life because my privilege has been growing and my opportunities being fulfilled. i'm scared i'm again becoming someone i don't want to be, i need to be more careful. 

a lot of the nights are sad, but i'm trying my best to keep it all under control. i haven't been too successful with that bwhdabhsba but i am really trying my best.

i'm really fine and i'm handling everything pretty well in my opinon hahaha. i'm very grateful of everything that has happened so far, and having a partner that completely understands just makes life easier. i need to be better for her. 

i'm very hopeful. 

i haven't been able to work on anything too seriously. i can't create much art, but i'm putting everything together little by little. it's a little hard trying to balance so much, this all so new to me.

I HATE SUNDAYS

a song i listened to reminded me of how much i hated sundays growing up. lagi ko naaalala yung hassle ng mga kailangan for monday and pag-iwas ko sa kagustuhan ng pamilya ko magsimba. then i met you. i couldn't get enough of you and i still can't get enough. since i met you, i wanted to be with you for every second that i breathe. and i couldn't bother to care if i "lost" my weekends. my hands couldn't stay that long without holding yours. i would ask if i could come see you in the weekend and you let me. soon enough sundays became our day to hang out in the weekend kahit magkikita na rin talaga tayo kinabukasan. we'd eat snacks, sit around the places na sawa ka na (sorry), and just talk or walk in silence. it's so perfect. being with you is always so perfect. okay pa kahit raratratin ako sa pag-uwi dahil inabot na ng late at may pasok bukas. i remember how i used to hate sundays, now it's one of my favorite days of the week. i say "yehey! sunday na. makikita na kita uli." and i can't stop thinking of the day i won't have to go away and home is where you and i stay.

conversations demo

this song is about

link to the song

happy 100 posts!

lablab hehe. eto oh kanta na walang kwenta

no more blood. only sweat and tears.

may isusulat dapat ako dito eh. baka mamaya nalang kung maalala ko pa. enjoy my shit vocals.

july 4 broadcast recording

this is what people around the area were hearing. please let me know what you think of the whole thing.

not a cover (untitled song)

covers compilation (pahintulot) 2024 version

the cheesecake song

even if i barely finish the songs i write and end up hating every single one of them, i am not giving up on the dream of writing, recording, and releasing an album (or even an EP.)

it's casanova season again. i hope it lasts long.

naaalala mo ba yung kantang to? i shared it with u hoping you'll like it as much as i do. nagkaroon ng panahon kung saan ikaw yung naiisip ko sa kantang to pag pinapatugtog ko habang umuulan ng malakas. ngayon ko nalang ulit naalala yun. nasa labas ka parin ba pag umuulan? pinipili kong manatili nalang dito sa bahay at damdamin yung malamig na hangin. pinagmamasdan ko kung paano niya iniiba yung galaw ng bawat patak ng ulan bago tuluyang bumagsak sa mga bubong. hindi ko alam. hindi naman nagbabago ang ulan, pero ibang iba na siya ngayon.

boop!

welcome here sa blogspot!! i've always wanted to have a website. i originally wanted to have my own domain, but my wallet has been hurting since the day i got it so this'll have to do for now. i'm not sure pa ano yung magiging difference nitong website sa facebook page, but i do have a few ideas of what to put on here that I won't share sa page. i might fill this with deeper secrets! i'll share stuff that isn't mine too. i'll share things i love. i hope you'll get to see how this "blog" grows over time. thank you for visiting!^^